Sometimes connecting with dear friends makes all the difference.
This can be particularly true when transitioning from home to assisted living, and even more so when old friends re-connect and are reunited as new neighbors.
Maureen Lembke and Dixie Ellston, residents at Prairie Hills in Des Moines, were friends starting in the 1960’s through 1972, brought together by their daughters, who were best friends and classmates.
“We got acquainted through our daughters, who were best friends in Jr. High and High School. We would take turns picking them up from the ballgame and taking them up to Pizza Hut and then we would go back and pick them up. One week my husband, Bud, and I would pick them up and the next week Maureen and her husband, Vern, would do it,” said Dixie. “Our daughters are still friends. They 
adore one another,” she added.
Maintaining “connected communities” often means friends keeping in touch and Lembke and Ellston exemplify this idea, perfectly. For many years, they and their husbands spent every Saturday night playing cards together. The game of choice? Rummy Royal. Altogether, there were three couples who played.
“We played cards and it was more fun to play with six. We played for pennies and when we won, you would have thought we had won a million dollars we would be so excited. We kept our pennies in bags and jars and we wouldn’t spend a penny for nothing, that was our gambling money. We used to have a lot of fun,” said Lembke with a giggle.
By 1972, The Ellstons became so busy with life that they were unable to continue their Saturday night card games. Their son, Jerry, played baseball and Bud coached the team. Between practices every weeknight and games every weekend, there was little time for much else.
Fast forward to 2014, Bud was having trouble walking and was taking therapy. His doctor recommend they move from their independent living apartment to an assisted living apartment. In January of 2014, Dixie and Bud went to Prairie Hills at Des Moines to take a tour. Dixie’s daughter had told her that Maureen, her old friend, was living there. When Dixie found out that her dear friend Maureen lived at Prairie Hills she wanted to go see her.
“We didn’t know Prairie Hills existed until Maureen’s daughter, Linda, and our daughter, Deone, called me and told me Maure
en was in assisted living. Bud and I wanted to see the place, because Maureen was there,” said Dixie.
The day Dixie went to tour Prairie Hills, she asked to go to Maureen’s apartment. When the two friends saw each other, neither recognized the other. Time had changed their faces, hair and bodies. When the Prairie Hills staff asked Maureen if she recognized the lady in front of her, this was her reply.
“Well, I should, but I don’t” said Lembke.
The last time they had seen each other, they were in their 30‘s. All those years later, Dixie was 84 and Maureen was 83 when they saw each other next. Both admitted that neither of them would have recognized the other, if they had passed by the other on the street.
“I would have never known her. She just looked different. As you get older, you change. I used to be a skinny thing, I am not skinny any more. She still looks good and is the same size,” said Lembke.
“When we saw each other at Maureen’s apartment, I didn’t know her and she didn’t know me. Too many years had gone by. We had gotten old. When she was young, she had dark auburn hair and I had dark brown hair. We both have white hair now,” said Dixie.
Maureen has lived at Prairie Hills for two years. Vern passed away about 15 years prior. Dixie and Bud moved directly across the hall from Maureen about one year ago.
“When we were talking with Maureen, she said ‘Oh, I love it here.’ So, my son thought, ‘Well, if it is good enough for Maureen, it is good enough for mom.’ Now, we see each other every single day. At every meal, she comes out of her apartment and we go out of ours, so we walk down the hall together. And then her table is next to mine and my husband’s,” said Dixie.
Dixie and Maureen’s bond has become strong again. They were able to form a strong authentic relationship based on the relationship they had during their younger years.
“We just picked up where we left off and became good friends again. You would never dream you would be living by each other after all of those years. It is really good that we have each other,” said Dixie. “I would say we have a special bond because of our friendship throughout our lives. I just feel better that I know someone here, rather than coming in with all complete strangers.
And even though we didn’t recognize each other, we have become good friends again,” she added.
“Ending up together is very nice. I know Dixie is there, which makes it nice.
I ran out of chocolate and she gave me some chocolate candy bars the other day. We know we are there for each other if need be,” said Lembke.
The two no longer play cards together on Saturday night, but they do have a new tradition. Once per week they go for coffee in the dining room, where they talk about old times, new times and their families.
“They reminisce. They still just have a ball together and they just laugh. It is kind of neat how they make a point to sit down and have coffee with each other once per week. It’s not cards, but it is carrying on the same tradition that they had on Saturday nights, but, now they sit and have a cup of coffee. They are just both really, really neat ladies,” said Sue Stocker, community relations director at Prairie Hills of Des Moines.
In addition to the laughter, joy and storytelling they share, both Dixie and Maureen said they find comfort in knowing someone at the assisted living community who they have known for practically their entire adult lives.
“It makes you feel more secure when you know someone,” said Dixie. “I think it is wonderful that we can meet each other and enjoy each other again like we did when we were young. It doesn’t always happen that way,” she said.
The post Second Time Around, Old Friends Re-Connect at Des Moines Assisted Living Community appeared first on Provision Living | Assisted Living and Memory Care.